Being serious.

Yesterday was the Independence Day. How is one supposed to feel? Liberated? Free-spirited? Unconstrained? Footloose?

I feel wasted .. useless and wasted .. and no, I am NOT drunk :|

I have no sense of purpose and have still not found my calling.

Exactly 2 weeks from now I will be 2 days into the training on my new job. There is seemingly a lot to do. But I just don't feel like doing it.

Today, most of my time is devoted to the net, movies and music. And to say that I am done being idle and with nothing serious to do would be an understatement. Just how many movies can a person watch for sixty eight consecutive days??

My energy reserves are not being utilized in ways I would appreciate.

I have always been a restless person. I always need something or the other to keep me occupied. And satisfaction is what I have related to the phrase being serious. As long as I am serious about whatever I do, I have felt content. But ever since the last of engineering exams was over I stopped caring about anything. I have had the same pathetic routine to be followed religiously every single day of my pre-work break. I do nothing I can call worthwhile.

So, basically, my vacation is really getting to me! I have lost all seriousness in whatever I do. :| and its NOT a nice feeling. Even though I have been subjected to so many changes lately, it seems like nothing would motivate me. I just wouldn't charge into action any longer and give it all I have. Or maybe dealing with my changed status quo is the cause for all this!

Whatever it is, I do not like it. Maybe I do need that round of drinks I am always being offered. And I would like to be serious again. Seriously! :|

Little Miss Innocent turns 22 :)

Today, I am looking forward to:

1. painting the town red
2. getting drunk
3. dancing all night
4. being asked "you and me babe .. how about it? ;)"
5. Eating chocolate cake with ice cream :D

but then, I look forward to many many things which never materialize when I want them to :|

To hell with it!

Happy Birthday to me! :)

Here comes the hot-stepper!

Time and again I have been proved wrong in thinking one thing .. that I might actually be able to dance! :|

If you scan my playlists on media player you will find one dedicated to dance music (mainly club, techno, a lil bit of reggae, hip-hop and salsa mixes) .. brimming with (I cannot guarantee the latest but) some really groovy tunes you can shake your booty to. Many have been surprised/shocked by this revelation. Getting jiggy may be encoded in my gray cells but somehow my body fails to decipher and execute it. :|

In the initial stages of growing up I used to be forced to dance with everyone at the weddings and birthday parties. The main, nay, the ONLY force behind all this was me mums (who loves to dance and is the life of every party). Well, this is one case where daughter unlike mother. (Oye! That was only for the dancing part, you jerk! I still am the life of the parteh in my own unique way :P)

Anyway, that era passed and I entered the teeny bopper stage, where I would be nagged again, by my contemporaries this time. But it proved to be more difficult. No amount of persuasion was going to make me put even my little foot finger on the dance floor. Not even the convincing look in the eyes of the cutest guy around .. not even when he tried to pull me up from where I was seated towards himself. (okay .. it was something like that :P) And I guess if that could not make me dance, nothing else ever would. But I suspect that happened only because it was much later that I realized the guy was totally hot. And yes, I regret that moment till this day :( If I meet him any day now, I definitely want a dance with him!

Anyway, moving ahead, it was a dormant period and nobody tried any stunts with me until the end-of-teens. By this time I had started to become a little open to the idea of shaking one’s body alongside total strangers united together for their common passion for dance (or whatever). And hence had quite a few groovy sessions. My favorite would be a particular rain dance and a phase of craziness at 2 am on a certain night (which i shall delve into later) ;) 

I don’t really like to move to the sounds of bolly and most Punjabi remixes. But it so happens that whenever I gather courage to show my in-ability, the DJ will promptly start belting out one of the many Punjabi remixes :| and now that I’m on the floor I can’t just move away and hence have to utilize my non-existent skills to gyrate to something I detest.

I’d really like to learn salsa .. that’s one of the things on my to-do-before-I-die list. I’ve been made an offer for the same by two different individuals on two different occasions. And this time, I am seriously going to consider them!

You’ve heard of bathroom singers. But I am a bathroom (actually, just my room) dancer. The status has actually risen from the mute spectator to “room” dancer to the courageous one trying to move on the dance floor. But hey, atleast now I am trying!

I think two/two-and-a-half drinks ought to prepare me to unleash the R-factor in DANCE (that’s right .. no R in dance hence I don’t think I can ever unleash that non-existent power of mine :|)

And, wherever he might be, I’d like that afore-mentioned guy to know

You broke my heart,
'Cause I couldn't dance.
You didn't even want me around,
And now I'm back, to let you know,
I can really shake 'em down.

I can mash-potato,
And I can do the twist.
Now tell me baby,
Do you like it like this? ;)

[Watch the whole thing here.]

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I think it is time I brought the R-factor into dance. Period.

je vous déteste :x

I hate you o zukaam.
I hate the way you make me feel.
Why do you have to affect me so??
I mean, what's the deal?! :O

You know I cannot stand you
and I certainly cannot sleep,
when all you do is trouble my nose
and cause sneezes that make me weep.

I wish you could find another prey
and leave me all alone,
so I can have all the frozen delights
and my favourite ice-cream cone.

My name is .. uh .. never mind :|

I have a lovely name .. Ruchi. Its short and sweet. The reason my mom chose a short name was that no one is ever able to mar the same, thereby, saving me from any embarrassments that might arise from twisted nicks!

But life was not to stop at that. Today, handful of people are just NOT ready to address me by my name. :| .. and this thankfully happens mostly on gtalk!

Let us begin with Gayatri, a.k.a, Pinky (:P :P). To her I am either bitch or biyatch. If she uses my name I instantly know something’s wrong with her.
So it’s always: bitch! Send me d pix! ; bitch! Wotcha doin? ; u bitch! How could you do that?! and this doesn’t stop at just gtalk .. it very well continues in real life also.

Next, one fine evening, I am christened kinksta (origin: kinky) by gayatri and shruti .. don't ask me for any dirty details :|

Now Gauri or miss G has this weird syndrome of nicknaming every individual she knows, never once calling them by their names. I call this the G syndrome.
So amongst both of us we have a range of nicks we use for others.
However, G loves being G and so she will not leave me out either!
So for her I am:
auntyyyyyyy
uncleeeeeee
jaanu
abbeyyyy
Oye!
And yes, kinky :|

We are also drama queens .. big ones at that. So our chosen form of addressing also includes:
karamjali
kalmuhi
behaya
besharam
badtameez!
And this she uses for both the sexes sans any transformation. (yes abhijit, I know what you’re going through!)

For a dearest friend I am her bhawra while she is my philower :| (it was totally her idea to take our relationship of best friends to another level :| )

There are some others who get a little out of hand and try their luck with:
babyyyyyyy
honeyyy
lowwe
dahling

chweetie pie
doll (egawds!)
what’s with you guys?! They’re meant to irritate me of course .. and well, I do it to people for the same reason! :D anyway, they are passé now.

A few others would be:
kudiye
sohniye ;)

bum
Picky fish! (courtesy my stat msg and my own temperament)

Other stuff that I have been called is, well, not appropriate to be disclosed here in public! :|

Out of all of the above I’d pick Picky fish to be my favorite.

But the best I have been called is ..... The Narcotic ..... because, apparently, I’m addictive! ;)

So beta .. what is it that you do? ;)

Okay .. so I never intended to do this post but I have nothing better to do and miss G has been pushing me to blog about something/anything.

Ever since I was a little kid I have loved huge gatherings .. be it weddings (the kind you have in Delhi), dinners, lunches/brunches. The idea is to have, great food of course, and a lot of people around who know how to have a good time :) However, times change and suddenly you are not a little kid anymore. You realize that you are nearing that dreadful stage .. the marriageable age (or THE age).

Then you also realize that such family gatherings serve other not-so-nice purposes.

Now picture this:

A lavish affair going on somewhere in the suburbs of Delhi (yes I love that place and cannot stop mentioning it in almost every post of mine!!) lets make it a dinner parteh .. I love dinners :D .. and its someone’s wedding anniversary. So there are a lot of people present .. most know each other .. and those of you who don’t need not fret .. by the end of the evening you will have gotten acquainted with atleast 5 couples .. the number might increase if you have kids of THE age. However, the number is also subject to availability.

You will find several groups of women .. lets call them “The Social Butterflies” (TSB).

Now enter a young eligible bachelor. He’s just an average guy .. not a stunner and definitely not the don’t-show-me-your-face kinds. Just a normal guy called Kabir (no I don’t know any Kabir .. I just happen to like the name)And one of the TSBs mentions that Kabir is an engineer (hmm .. an engineer! I wonder what’s his package…) Every lady within the radius of 10feet will start inching closer to hear what more she has to say.And so, before the night ends EVERY lady in the house will know:

• His name
  
• His parents' name
  
• His profession
  
• His parents' profession
  
• Rest of his family members
  
• Clandestine affairs, if applicable
  

And what are some mums thinking?

Mum 1 (has a daughter in 2nd year): Kabir makes it to her list of bachelors-to-be-considered-after-some-time-has-passed

Mum 2 (has a daughter in final year): aaahh! She tries to get introduced to him and his parents and before they know it they have been invited to dinner the very next day.

Mum 3 (has a daughter older to Kabir): enquires if he has eligible AND older brothers.

And dads are normally not bothered about all this.

The same goes for a gal (of THE age) .. let’s call her Ria .. an average girl .. but since this is a gala dinner she has taken special care in dressing herself up .. so basically she is one of the many showstoppers treading the grounds. The same situation repeats (as was with Kabir). Additionally, the ladies will also scrutinize her: walk, talk, expressions, ensemble, make-up, accessories, hair, footwear .. everything to the last detail!

And don’t you HATE it when women do that? They'll do it everywhere .. at parties, on morning/evening walks, in restrooms at a multiplexes/malls .. Literally check you out! Ugghh .. I’d rather be checked out by a stunner with brains and etiquettes! And this I speak on behalf of both the sexes!

All this while when you met new people and your parents got you introduced to some kids it was just so that you could have some company and leave them to have a great time sans you. But NOW (THE age) when they introduce you to someone (read guy/girl .. and mums will do that only if she approves of him/her) you know where its heading!

Well, if you’re interested you’ve hit jackpot, else, RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!

1 AM and lack of entertainment!

An excerpt of a text chat with my lowwe! ;)

Gau baby .. we have elevated from pardners in crime to poets in rhyme!

GP: kya kar rahi hai

me: intezaar

GP: kiska?

me: ki kab aayega mera sapno ka rajkumar
jis se karti hoon main pyaar
aur mujhe abhi chalani hai meri car
so that i can drive upto the nearesht bar
called "highway shtar"
and order an apple martini baar baar
:D

GP: and then teri maa kar degi tere liye band tere ghar ka dwaar

me: agar main pahunchi wapas subah baj ke chaar
;)

GP: tu reh jayegi fir life mein banke bekaar

me: haan .. waise bhi bekaar ban ne ke bahane hain hazaar

GP: baat to hain dumdaar
aur tumko bhi hain ikraar
kya tumhare dil aur dimaag GPin ho rahi hain takraar?

me: haan .. kyunki main hu sun ne ko bekaraar

GP: fikar na karo... hum bhi hain dildaar

me: toh kya tumse kar lu main aankhen chaar?
and forget the rajkumar?

GP: pehle jaa ke aau...jamna paar

me: yeh shame kyu yaar?

GP: aur proove karke batao ki P = I square R

me: kya hoga agar main gayi haar?!

GP: tum nahi harogi...tum to ho samajhdaar

me: shayad yahi hai geeta ka saar!

GP: ab maan jaao humari baat... na karo inkaar

me: uthao apne hathyar

GP: ho jaao tayyaar

GP: kyunki shayad tumhe finally ho gaya hai pyaar
ab kaun hai woh yaar...jise tumne banaya dildaar?

me: uske paas toh hai daaru ka bhandaar
jis se main kamei hu pyaar
par khabardaar!
mat koshish karna humare beech dalne ko deewaar!
nahi toh bhej denge tumhe to a land which is faaaaaaaar
jahan milega khaane ko bas pyaaz aur achaar :P

GP: issse pehle ki tum humein kahi bhejo... hum ho jayenge faraar

me: :P
toh goodnite, shubhratri, shabba khair mere yaar!
;)

CUT LOOOOOOOOOOOSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D

Finished with the lasht theory paper of my engineering course today!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yayyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

had a few laughs with the gang in college after the paper .. had a few rolls on my way home .. some new roll house has opened up near my place .. but the rolls weren't upto the mark .. some pals planned a club night tonight .. and guess who didn't go?? hmph!
so much for finishing off the 39th written exam of engineering!!!!! :x

Anyway .. came home .. saw Bheja Fry (its a movie .. for all u ignorant bachhas) .. really really awesome movie!! i lowwwed it :D
then hogged like a pig .. then here i am .. online .. just finished sending daddy a budday e-card AND a father's day e-card .. his budday's tomorrow and for the phusht time he isn't here with us :( .. i am missing him  :( ................ couldn't even get through to him on his cell ..... i think he isn't back from the museum yet ..... ohh he's in Germany btw and he went to the Mercedes benz museum in Stuttgart today!!!!! :)

Anyway .. i already have a lotta blog drafts lined up .. let us see how many get to see the light of your eyes ;)
and i have 6 paperbacks lined up for me to read .. and some more online books .. and lotsa movies to be seen
BUTTT .. phusht and foremost i need to go SHOPPING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i need everything new!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't u think i deserve it?? ;)

Gtalk is a BITCH!! :x

It makes you an addict.
It makes you lose your sanity.
It keeps you online for hours together.
It makes you change your display pic @ of 4 pix per 10 seconds.
It tricks you in every possible way there is!! :(
It blinds you completely.


That's Gtalk for you people!


How to know you're a gtalk addict?? (I "discovered" it today .. and I won't call it serendipity : for it wasn't, in the least, pleasant!)
So I was online and a pal had the following status message displayed:

glisten glisten!!

Now for the test. How would you read it??



Normal people will read it as .. yes yes .. glisten - as in shine like a wet or polished surface.



Thank the heavens if THAT'S how you read it.



Gtalk addicts will, however, beg to differ .. they view the above as: glisten glisten :



Yes .... you got that right ..... I was the one who saw the unseeable..... :(

PS: If any of you visiting this page are gtalk addicts .. please say aye .. 'coz I feel ostracized :(

From worse to verse.....

Ask me not why this piece has been put into writing ..... Truth is, I do not know myself.


It is a shaky ground where she stands,
The road ahead is not one less travelled.
Yet a panic grips her so tight.....
Unsure of all the vigour
that every mortal thought she was blessed with,
that effervescence, that confidence
which had kept her alive,
All sublimed like it never existed.....

Her soul curses her heart, her whole self.
Yes! Her soul curses her today.
The little voice in her head
implores her to let go,
but it is not easy to do so.

With no will of her own
she seems to be possessed by an unknown force.
Palpitations of the heart and her ceasing breath,
The answer, it seems, lies in her death.
Letting her die, I wish, hard it wouldn't be,
But at the end of the day
I am her, she is me.

Of Small Hours and Little Wonders!

In the end

We will only just remember how it feels

Our lives are made
In these small hours
These little wonders,
These twists & turns of fate.
Time falls away,
But these small hours,
These small hours still remain.

Its pretty ironical that I came across this song exactly the day I was reminiscing about the days gone by .. leaving me with a weirdly nice kind of feeling which is inexplicable.

It’s a track sung by Rob Thomas (of Matchbox 20 fame) for the movie Meet the Robinsons (an animation).

The “small hours” and the “little wonders” that Rob croons about are what constituted of happYness for me in the past week. These were the hours I spent with my friends, both old and new. And my "life was made" in "those twists and turns of fate". ;-)

In retrospect last week was probably the best week of my life in the past few months. I spent quality time with 3 of the most amazing conversationalists I have ever come across (with 2 of them being extremely close friends of mine). And these well spent “small hours” will probably see me through tough times that I may have to face in a few days. It’s always nice to know that there are people out there who genuinely care for you and would go to any lengths to help you out in distress.

They will lecture you about what a shitpiece of a wimp you are, how naïve you are, how unreasonable you are being and the very next moment they will be churning out master plans to bail you out of any dire straits that arise.

I just want to thank these people (you know who you are) who were kind enough to grant me my very own “small hours” and “little wonders”. I love you guys! :D

PS: the link to the song stands corrected!

Fate strikes back! ;)

Referring to a couple of posts back I'd like to let everyone know .. fate DOES exist!! I had my proof yesterday! ;)

No matter how many plans you make OR alternatively avoid making any plans .. if something has to happen it sure as hell happens!
Fate is pretty adjustable you see .. it will fit perfectly with your day's schedule .. any time, any place .. any where.

However, there are instances when it has a screwed up sense of timing!! Just like yesterday :|
Everything was PERFECT! Yet a minor detail had been overlooked! So it wasn't quite like I had anticipated.

But the Q now is .. if fate DID bring things together but not to the extent you would have liked .. do YOU then take the next steps?? or do you wait for fate to strike .. again?!

Calling you.....

You guys HAVE TO hear this!
Came across the song accidentally and it's amongst my favourite ones at this moment! :-)
Enjoy people! :-)

Murphy's law personified!!

"Anything that can go wrong, will—at the worst possible moment"

The blown up version of the incurable gash:

Why me God?? Why???!! :(

What in the world .....

..... can make a brown-eyed girl turn blue??!!!

At the moment:

1. fate (She'll find out soon if it does or not)

2. things taking too long to get over

3. the months of May and June

4. not being able to read enough good books

5. not being able to write in peace

6. not being able to go where she wants to (at the moment: Delhi and Germany)

7. not being able to meet whom she wants to (at the moment: her best mate Kabu whom she hasn't seen for over a year)

8. not being able to do what she wants to (at the moment: finish writing an incomplete piece ; going on a long drive all by herself)

9. the unbearable heat and sudden power cuts = no AC, no TV, no moozheek

10. the society roads (make riding a bike hell .. its like taking part in one of those quarry races : )

11. the gol-guppe she had round the corner of her block (makes her think of Dilli again and again :(( )

12. movies she cannot find

13. CDs/DVDs she's lost in the mess that surrounds her

14. her boring boring (atleast according to her) wardrobe

Fate ..... or something like it.

Hmmmm ..... I am waiting ..... waiting to know what fate has in store for me ..... that is, if it does infact exist! Just like it did in Serendipity!

And for my first proof of fate's existence I need to wait for approx. 12 days more.

Will let you all know if it DOES exist or not!

PS: If you havn't followed the above lines .. that's okay .. you were not meant to understand them anyways.

If you DID understand what I have just been saying .. pls pls pls don't kill me!

Of men, professions and tequila.....

So one evening I was sitting at the pool side with a couple of girl friends I'd met after a long long time.
Amidst all the updates on each of us the conversation drifted towards .. yes that's right .. guys!
It all started with who was seeing who and where and how they'd met them and why in the world did they then break up?!

Anyway, my pal was thinking of various sorta-unconventional professions each of us would like our men(yes men .. NOT boys :P) to be in.
AND for some reason all IIT, IIM, MIT, Stanford, HBS (and the likes of these) grads were strictly ruled out.
So we came up with a small list of our own:


1. A struggling artist (they make a cute sight!)

2. An author (no comments)

3. A Clock/WatchMaker (I'm sure you won't mind if his business house happens to be a Tag Heuer or a Fossil ;))

4. A fashion designer (no more wardrobe problems although one can't guarantee no wardrobe malfunctions!)

5. An exotic chef/chef-cooking-exotic dishes in exotic places (:D yummy in the tummy!)

6. Dope peddlar (stoned already, eh?)

7. A bartender (shake, stir, shot, swirl?)

8. A masseur (aaahhhhh, oooohhhh, awesome!!)

9. Kiss-and-tell prof.(who has also authored a bestseller named "The Know-how/art of kissing" AND has workshops spread across the globe)

10. A pole dancer/stripper (anyone?)

Well .. that's all we could come up with before the conversation drifted away into yet another direction.

My personal favourite is a combination of two of the above:

A masseur by day and a bartender by night! ;)

Got anymore?

Caught in the act .. well .. almost! ;)

Every time I hear anyone say the phrase “birthday party” I am reminded of my childhood.
The word birthday brings back several memories but the choicest of the lot is the one associated with this one party that happened in Gwalior a long, long time ago.

We were 3rd graders then, my cousin and I. I had been packed off to Gwalior for the very first holiday on my own, where my chachu-chachi were residing at that time.
Early age to be holidaying around, don’t you think? Hehhe … but we had plenty of supervision over us so that we didn’t go astray. Damn!

However on one occasion we DID get away from the constant supervision of this maid my chachi had employed to look over us kids.

It was the first time we had ventured outside the house, unattended. It was also the first time we had ever gate-crashed a party! ;) :D

Of course we didn’t know that was what it was called!

It was this birthday party going on in the neighbourhood. We’d been seeing all the preparations being made since noon. Chachi was out to work as usual. So it was just the maid, my cuz (Neha) and I at home. We even gave her a hard time while she was trying to get us to take our usual siesta. But we simply refused to be put off to sleep. Not while we could see the house diagonally opposite to ours being decorated with balloons. (did I mention we used to luuuuuuurve balloons so much that we could die to have them!)

Anyway, it was around 5pm, our play time, and the maid was pretty tired as it is. She didn’t even take a second look at us when we popped in the kitchen to say that we were just going around the block.

Now, over the years we have learnt that in order to gatecrash and NOT get caught one must be dressed for the occasion. However we’ve never had any such problems as we’ve always been well dressed kids. :)
Hence it served doule purpose. We didn’t need to change, nor did anyone doubt our activities.

Exactly 5 minutes later we reached the targeted venue. The first thing we did was to make way towards the cake … funny how as kids we always know WHERE the cake’s going to be! :D

Anyway, we just went inside … looking our best … no one still doubting us.
There would be an occasional aunty/uncle pulling Neha’s or my own cheeks while uttering something as preposterous as “hai!!!!! Kitne cute bachhe hain!!!!!” (oh!!what cute kids!!)

So we were just about to near the aunty serving the yummy mountain of chocolat that lay before us. (I am leching already … albeit in my mind :( ;) )
And then it happened.

A hand pulled me back. And my cousin, who was in front of me, had a shocked look on her face. I turned to take a look at the “shocker” and it was … no not the maid but my dearest chachi.

No chance of getting the cake now! :|

A=cake aunty ;)
C=chachi

A: Oh hello Mrs.Tandon! How wonderful to see you! You look like you have just returned from work!
C: Yes indeed!

(me thinking … now toh we’re dead … no one can save us)
Shit … hum log itna darr gaye thhey uss din … and we thought ki ab daant padegi.

Still no sign of cake. :|

C to A: arrey the kids had left Pooja’s birthday gift at home. I saw them leaving without it and so came in to hand it over.

Are you gonna give us the f***** cake or not??! :x

C to me: you should’ve waited  for me beta … and how careless you kids are becoming day by day.

And then I remembered … we had actually been called for that party!
Imagine … gatecrashing a party you’ve been invited to! :| Dumb thing we forgot. The kid had just moved in. :|

Still leching at the cake.

A: arrey the gift isn’t running away … Mrs.Tandon please help yourself with the refreshments. You look tired and hungry! Meanwhile I will serve the kids with cake.

:D :D :D :D :D FINALLY!!!!! Our prayers were answered as we dug into the humongous pieces of cake we each got which I think was owing to the huge, fat package my aunt had brought in with her ;)

And yes, we DID meet Pooja and wished her … hogged, played, and danced … the works.
Overall, quite an interesting evening! ;)

The Blackout! (ver.2.0.3)

NOTE: Another of my co-authored works .. this time with my dearest dearest mate :D
This is her version .. while the following is mine :D
HAPPY READING! :D


One sunny afternoon on my way to the lab...


Two strangers, A and G, towards their respective destinations, completely unaware of the shock fate had in store for them. And then it happened.... the lights went off... the elevator stopped mid-way with a jerk.

G,A in synch: ohhhh shittt!!!

G: * after few seconds of silence and after their pupils adjusted to the dark * Ok!! Do you have someone's number?

A: No... I really have to go.. I am feeling so suffocated!

G: K wait... I'll call someone.

G: * on phone with Chandu, her project partner *....Yaar hum lift mein atak gaye hai.. please call someone...

Chandu to Sh sir: Sir lift....

Sh Sir(SS): चलो बचाने चलो ...!! (lets go help!!)

SS: helloooooo

G: hellooooooooooooooo

A: I am really scared. I have to go jaldi se. I can't live in a suffocating environment.

G: (and I can!!) Its ok... they're here. Wont take too long.

A: Thank god you're with me... I dont know what I'd have done without you.

G: (yea yea....)

Chandu: कौनसे फलोर पे अटके हो ? (which floor are you guys stuck on?)

G: yaar... how the hell will I know???!!

* Meanwhile... G and A getting introduced. *


A: Didi, I am never gonna travel in this lift again. I hate suffocation.

G: (yea... like I'm loving it!) hmm

* SS meanwhile trying his best to open the door stuck between 3rd and 4th floor *

SS (screaming): कितने लोग हैं अन्दर ?? (how many of you inside the lift??)

G: अब्बे उस से तुमको क्या बे .. lift को खोलो !! (what the f*** do you care .. just open the damn lift!! )

SS: excuse me! this is sh sir .. who was that??

(Chandu thinking to herself .. what the f*** was G thinking .. साली खुद तो मरेगी , मुझेभी मरवाएगी .. how can she talk to sir like that?! )

G to A: listen .. u dont wanna die na?

A (sounding anxious) : no didi .. i hate suffocation .. (screaming) please heeelllllppppppp someone!!

SS: how many of you???!!

A(almost crying): sir its two of us in here.....

* meanwhile G shuts A's mouth lest she says anything further *

G to A(muffled voices): listen .. and listen carefully .. i will not repeat this .. by the way .. which branch are u in??

* G loosens the fingers around A's mouth *

A: *sob sob* Info Tech

* A's mouth sealed again *

SS: darna mat bacchon .. everything will be fine .. we are trying our best.

G(muffled voice .. A's mouth still sealed): good .. listen now .. if sir asks again who it was then you say you were the one .
He is my project guide and never going to cross paths with you because you are not from his department .. badle mein i will treat you at the new pizza corner that has opened near the college.

If you decline this proposal AND if we happen to get out of this godforsaken lift i will as it is skin you alive .. or you will anyways die of suffocation and probably so will I.

* meanwhile a bright light shone into their eyes .. the lights were back .. the fact that A didn't die after seeing G's bloodshot eyes was a miracle .. she quietly agreed to obey G's orders .. the lift arrived exactly two seconds later on the 4th floor .. the door opened and G ran for her life .. away from that maddening lift and the maddening girl .. SS arrived 3 seconds later on the scene *

SS to A: are you alright??

A(still recovering from the shock): huh-uh .. yes .. i th-think so .. (zapped look)

SS: where's the other girl?

A: uh-huh .. sir .. what sir .. which other girl??!

SS: the other one .. there were two of you no??

A: n-n-no sir .. there was only me in there .. you must have heard me talking .. i have a
habit of talking to myself when stuck in enclosed spaces.....

SS: hmm .. i thought i heard two different voices ..

A: sir .. i dont know .. it was only me in there ..... * faints *

SS to Chandu(who had followed SS to meet G): just help me pls .. who had called u up?? do you know this girl?

Chandu: uh-uh .. yes sir .. she is my distant cousin .. she had only called me up .. sorry sir but she has a little mental problem ..
(before SS can open his mouth) ..... sir pls dont ask about it .. we in our family do not like to talk about it ..

* meanwhile Chandu spots G(who has caught her breath and looks like she's been hunting for someone) *

Chandu to G: G.....where were you .. give me a hand, will you .. she has fainted again!

G: Ohh My God .. sure ..

SS: girls u need any help??

G & Chandu (in unison): NO SIR!! we'll take her from here ..

Chandu: thank you sir .. thank you very much

SS: no problem girls .. my doors are always open to you ..... * pause * ..... you may take
the day off for today .. get back to me with the project updates tomorrow morning .. and take care of her (pointing suspiciously at A)

G & Chandu: yes sir .. thank you sir

* a few moments pass *

Chandu: man G .. your neck was saved!! all thanks to this woman!! (looking adorably at her)

G: yeah .. damn .. Chandu I'll need to borrow some money for tomorrow if she becomes conscious again .. although she looks like she's in coma.....

Chandu: what?!

A(opens one eye): no ..... she's not in coma .. she's with the drama club (a smirk on her face)

Chandu and G(in unison): WHAT??!

A to G: and that treat better be good (stands up .. brushes off the dust from her salwar kameez .. picks up her bag and walks away gracefully .. Chandu and G looking at her with their eyes wide open and jaws dropped down)

Heaven don't hear me :(

   When I read this, nostalgia crept back in.

Its been more than 13 yrs since I parted with my beloved Del, my birthplace.
We've been to approx. 3 cities post leaving Delhi and each time I was actually pretty excited at the prospect of discovering something new. And not for one moment I ever thought about going back to Del. Maybe I was too young to realize anything.
But since the past 1.5 years the feeling of “going back” is getting stronger. This is both surprising and heart-wrenching.

Surprising because I have spent only 1st seven yrs of my life there and the visits back home have considerably reduced for me, reason being my studies and exams which always find way into days when there are functions like नाना नानी की golden anniversary being celebrated or one of my cousin bros getting married. So I am the ONLY one who stays back while everyone else makes their presence felt in दिल्ली।

My last trip to Del was approx. 4 yrs back. The 3 weeks there consisted of meeting known and unknown relatives, finding out my 12th board marks, getting my 1st ever सलवार कमीज़s stitched in 3 different styles (churidar, patiala, parallels .. never wearing them more than once each .. not too fond of them .. they take away a certain part of me and I’m not too comfortable with that), going to CP (Connaught Place for the uninitiated) and other places. And ofcourse नानीs place was awesome as usual.

Also met my 1st ever childhood friend. We’ve been catching up a lot lately. Listening to my rants about Del she has resolved to find me a nice पंजाबी मुंडा residing over there. She made me list down my specifications and she is on the lookout.

But I am not too sure if I ever want to live the rest of my life there.
However, I DO know what I want to do/not do the next time I visit Del.
I don’t want to meet unknown/long-lost relatives (unless there are some cute cousin bros) … only the closest family. I don’t want to sit at home watching TV … I don’t want people to say everytime they look at me "हाय! कितनी बड़ी हो गयी है !"

I want to visit every nook and corner of the city … from the ढाबाs to the discs to the smallest दुकान to the malls alike. I want to SEE Delhi. I want to FEEL Delhi. I want Delhi to treat me like her own … a Delhite! I want to see the night sky in Del … to me it will certainly look different. I want to experience Del to the last drop of my blood so that I never ever forget it.

I don’t know why I have been feeling so strongly about going back considering I haven’t really spent much time there. And it’s a heart-wrenching feeling. I feel pathetic thinking about it. All I know is that the harder I try to make my trip a reality the harder it is to realize.

I am waiting for the day I will get to go back … go back to look at the house where I was born (the place has been sold now) … and I don’t even have a photograph…………..Go back to meet my friends ... see the city on my own … probably make new friends.

Delhi beckons me and I am desperate to stand on that ground again that I once called home…

Million dollar Q.!

The million dollar Q. that I'd like to be answered right now is:

How does one judge a man??

:x

That's it!! I am NOT going to blog for ..... let's see how long I last!
Such a hectic time .. project suddenly stopped working  * waaaaaaaaannhhhhh *
This happens ONLY when the project competitions are a day too close!! :((

And 14 hours per day outside the house .. that's just getting to me .. not to mention .. the travelling even more so!! 
And I'd like to kick a few people in the arse.   :|

Ohh I loved it! :D

I'm looking and I'm liking! ;)

I just loved John Galliano's theme!
The first British designer to head a French haute couture house LMVH, he loves theatre and feminity and states: "My role is to seduce!"
Till date i wasn't aware of the designer .. my ignorance, I accept.
And I just landed on this page because of meaningless navigation. But I liked what I saw and just wanted to put it up for all to see! :)

And now that my cable provider is no longer airing Fashion TV I will have to satisfy myself with the pix from various creative shows on the net :(

And in case u're thinking I am an fashion freak, the answer is NO!
I am just an ardent admirer of art in any form :)

This is down right ridiculous!

Trapped in a pop-up haze.

Read the above article and you'll know why!

It is highly preposterous to know that some people choose to remain ignorant in today's world. Even when specialists belonging to the field come forward to testify!

Anyone who uses the Internet fairly regularly has, on more than one occasion, had the unfortunate opportunity to be bothered by the innumerable 
popups. 
Even more so on a machine that is NOT guarded by a firewall!!

And in this case the institution DID NOT have a firewall (because apparently they hadn't paid the bill!!). And it all started with two kids visiting a harmless hairstyle site and were redirected to the  porn sites and the pop-up shower followed. And so the teacher (who was not even present there) was to be blamed!

Ofcourse the teacher could have switched off the comp .. but while panicking she didn't.
But does a 40 yrs in jail for this supposed "offence" sound fair enough??
Jeez .. they can't even prove whether it was a deliberate mouse-click or a mere redirection to the porn site!! And they claim to be law makers who provide justice!!

I say .. innocent until proven guilty!! And shame on that ignorant sect of body of law!

Saure Gaure .. to keep you waiting! ;)

Okay .. so I didn't want to write anything at all. But with the pestering I was showered upon by my dearest dearest jaan (its not what you think!!) I just had to ..... :|

So I was thinking what I would like to write about. And I thought that listing out my options here would be a better idea instead. So in case my jaan or anyone else for that matter would like to pester me for writing in the future, they would also have an option of choosing a topic! :P

So here goes:

• A new fiction
• Lovey-dovey convos with my jaan ;) (aight .. I know you will hate that gau, won't you? or do you secretly wish for me to do that? :D)
•  Why I am pissed nowadays
• The dude who proposes and me who opposes
• My amazing taste in music, movies, food and absolutely everything!
• My recent loss in appetite :| (very shocking indeed!)
• My daily hectic schedule
• The prof who gave us a re-do for our ppt
• Strawberries and passion or vice-versa
• Serendipity - the movie and how it applies to real life
• The old uncle I've seen roaming around in my locality every single day!
• My new found love - my laptop
• My arguments for why I need more clothes, shoes, accessories etc. but sadly my mom doesn't read blogs!

That's it man .. I don't think I can come up with any more topics other than these at the moment!

And hey, Happy Holi to you all! :D

Kill me if you have to!!

Just finished with what I would like to call an "overdose of mushy crap with no plot at all". That is what is Mills and Boon all about!!
This was my second attempt at painstakingly figuring out what the hype was all about. The first attempt being made in 8th grade when I was bored to the end of my wits after reading the first page and threw the book in the waste-bin, literally. That my cousin promptly fetched it out and cradled it with so much fondness and chided me with "you're-too-young-to-understand" crapp is another story.
And this time I decided I was old enough, actually way too old, to attempt a second go at a catastrophic event like this!!
I want to apologize to someone I told about my engrossment with M&B. "Why are you insulting your own intelligence?", I was warned but didn't heed the warning.
And so, post-reading the P.o.C (Piece of Crapp), I vow never to let these eyes wander upon another one of its likes. If I am spotted with any such P.o.C I should instantly be separated from it. Kill me if you have to but don't let me read it again!!

what would you have done?

If your status read "single" would you hook-up with absolutely anyone coming your way (read 'you are on a holiday and so only for the duration you are there you want a "partner" ') or would you rather wait to start a meaningful relationship?

I won, I won, I won!! :D

okay .. however lame it may sound .. I won the inter-year word building competition at college today!! :D and I am down right excited about it!! :D
yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!! :D
* jumping up and down with the widest grin you've ever seen *
:D

I can't think of a title! :(

Alright! I am just back from watching Blood Diamond and I MUST say that Mr.Leonardo DiCaprio is a fantastic piece of work!! ;) :D
The first movie of his I've seen on big screen .. apart from maybe umm .. Titanic .. but man .. this dude is something, alright! He's changed so much! Right from titanic to catch me if u can to gangs of new york to blood diamond!! And I am certainly NOT complaining! ;)

But I am wondering about something .. two things actually.
Why do most girls cry while watching movies and why don't most girls like action flicks?

The reason I am pondering over these two questions is that I was flanked on either side with one specimen of both kinds today, at the multiplex . So I am sitting there .. engrossed in the movie for most part .. turning only when this piece of crapp would start kicking my seat in the back.
It was during one such head-turning moment I happened to spot this girl on my right crying away to glory. And I tried to analyze what could have possibly made her cry. And then it occured to me .. it was the sight of Leo nearing his end. He was on phone with Jennifer and I am sure she must have guessed that he was dying. But she never shed a tear .. and yet this girl .. half a world away .. is shedding her "precious drops of pearl" over a character that doesn't even exist!!
Ok .. I am sick already .. so I'll just stop wondering about it this instant.

Another head-turning moment caused me to find the girl sitting on my left trying to cope with the heavy doze of violence being inflicted upon her, courtesy ....... ME!
Had I known she doesn't like violent/action flicks I would have never dragged her for blood diamond. But c'mon .. if a Merc or an Audi isn't blown off to pieces, or bullet shots and firing taking place, or bikes zooming off .. with the riders displaying their stunts .. all within the 1st 15 seconds of the movie .. it seems like the movie isn't really going anywhere.

Now now .. I am not a hater of non-violent/non-action flicks .. its just that I'd prefer an MI:3 or a Tokyo Drift any day to a KANK or Titanic or any movie featuring Aishwarya Rai for that matter.
But I can watch ANY movie (barring all of Aishwarya's) as long as I am watching it on big screen! :D

Okay .. I can't really talk about movies either so I'll just stop writing here!

Don't ask me what I was thinking!

This is the (pls insert appropriate word/phrase) Q. of a lifetime .. MY lifetime atleast ;)

Q. What was it that the high school pass-out ask at the engineering desk put up at the edu.fair?

Ans. To B.E. or not to B.E.??!!!

ok .. now over here .. you're supposed to throw back your heads and laugh .. or atleast pretend to do so :|

PS: this is the (pls insert appropriate word/phrase) Q. of MY lifetime coz I promise NEVER again 2 come up with such fundoo sawaal  and equally fundoo jawab ;) .. ohh and btw .. this be an original one! :P

A Toast!

Today .. * hic * .. I would like to raise a toast .. * hic * .. to all the singles in this world ..

May they not lose their heads anytime soon!

Cheers!
* hic *

PS: Happy Valentine's Day to all! :D

Sitting here wasted and wounded .....

After the 4 day trip to the beaches I've been vela/lukkha (idle) for over a week now .. I've been feeling wasted and empty .. and frankly .. today it finally got to me!
Its killing me now .. I never thought I'd say that about being idle! But there .. I've said it!
And I discovered something else today .. just reading one paragraph from Business Today suddenly made me feel sensible and worthy and that I wasn't wasting my life!

I feel I should continue reading it .. atleast read it occasionally to remind myself that I'm not a wasted being!

I'm not feeling so lucky!

Why why why?????
Why do I have to mess up Qs that I can answer articulately 
after a little thinking?????
That too when the interviewer is from Google??!!!

This is how it should be:
you give the test -- you clear the test -- you proceed for a short round of HR interview -- you clear that -- you proceed to the technical round -- and after a long gruelling session of bombardments you screw up
Now that's okay!

and not:
you give the test -- you clear the test -- you proceed for a short round of HR interview -- you screw up a simple Q. like "What brings you here?" with a twisted answer .. something you never intended to say in the first place!!

talk about your interest in web and how crawlers work and how page rank works .. and the fact that why your blogpage is not being crawled even if it has been on the net for quite a few months now .. and maybe you could find an answer to that and deploy some techniques to finally have it figured in the search results!! (even though that would mean going in the direction they're trying to prevent .. but you have to think like a criminal to know the criminal)
 
So even if you're actually not v.happy with the job profile and no career growth in the area you eventually desire and them not disclosing the package and it not being Google Engg. itself and  just completed 2 years of its existence and relocation being a problem for a year or two ("because that's a big concern for us" .. "of course sir!") and no transfers being allowed between Google's SQE operations and Google Engg.
that doesn't mean you can screw up like that!! :(

Well ofcourse I'm not expecting a call anyways .. mostly due to relocation problem .. but you know what .. Google Engg. , they said, is hiring in a big way and we can apply to it .. its a great piece of news .. but I'm still not feeling lucky!

Inane conversations with the nagging voice in my head!

I saw him again today .. and yesterday .. in someone else's face .....
Its been long since he's gone from here and since I last met him or saw him .. what does he look like now?? .. and I thought that after much effort I had finally forgotten him .. but maybe I was wrong ..
And so I'm wondering .. actually I'm more of curious about what he's upto nowadays.
I have the number and even if its changed I can always get it from my resources .. but I'm wondering whether I should call.

will
Oh just why should you??
won't
Atleast let me ask how he's been!
will
Well .. he could've done that too, alright!
won't
Oh ok .. just this time .....
will
Why do YOU always have to be the first one??
won't
He did call last time you know .. on his own ..
will
When was the last time??
won't
couple of months back
will?
6 to be precise!
won't!!
He must be busy with the work load.....
will
SO ARE YOU!!
won't
But this way we'll lose touch forever.....
will
Oh goddammit .. don't tell me you have feelings for him!! :O
won't
Jeez no!
will?
Then why??
won't
Just want to stay in touch! He was like a best friend!
will
Well, he sure has forgotten THAT!!

Hmph! Alright then! Its a won't!!

Hatred, UnInterrupted .....

I just hate everything and everyone around me right now .. truly,madly,deeply!! I am weary, tired and injured from mind, body and soul alike.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!!!!!!! * pulling out my hair *

What I want at the moment is to run away to some place where no one knows me!!And just wander aimlessly in the lesser known parts of the town .. with maybe an occasional passer-by giving me a much wanted smile .. a really nice one at that .. coz I've got too much life running through my veins, going to waste.

Why can't everything go my way for min. 24 hrs??

Like if I have to pick up one out of the toner and the cleanser (in bottles that look alike) why will the toner come into my hand BEFORE the cleanser even though it is to be used AFTER?? WHY??

And why cant people just take one stand??Why do they have to always divert u to some other person saying "Whatever he/she says"?? WHY??

And why do people have to be insanely sarcastic about everything??and why do people have to display their "gadget-ical" knowledge when actually they should realize you are just not interested in what they're saying, esp.when u know more than them on that particular subject and dont give a shit about whether they own it or not!!

And why do people suggest that you go in for a new (read 'shit expensive') piece of crap when you are doing just fine with what you have?? They will never get it themselves but scorn at you if you appear satisfied with what you have!! What hypocrites!! yucks!

Why do people want to subject you to constant bantering??

And why do lectures have to take place??and why does everywhere you wanna go have to be so over-crowded??and the friggin traffic on the roads, the damn public transport, the maniacs flocking the streets at rush hour .....

And the damn NeoWORX premium trial expiring today .. that means losing a lot of important information!!why cant I be their 1 millionth customer and they may just let it continue forever??

Why do things close to my heart have to remain unfinished?? 
Why does it feel like what you ever wanted in your life will never materialize??
Sometimes, why cant you do things that you really really want to?? 
Why does a certain phobia grip you when you are thinking about extremely important decisions of your life??
And why are you sometimes being pulled in 22 different directions while your heart wants to follow the 23rd one??

What hellish cruelty!! A burning inferno!!
And the damn blogger is also giving problems!!

And NO, I don't hate the way my life is turning out. But it could certainly have turned out a wee bit better had certain events (that were totally uncalled for) not taken place!! But there's a hole in my soul, you can see it in my face.

Phew .. signing off for the day. I still hate most of the things around me. But in words of Scarlett O'Hara : "Tomorrow is another day ....."